Marie Kondo predictably opens e-commerce business after getting people to throw out their stuff

I was always cynical about the advice Marie Kondo was selling, and I even joked to friends that this would happen.

Every “lifestyle guru” eventually ends up hawking cheap shit. It’s their raison d’être. There was no way Marie Kondo wasn’t going to become another Joanna Gaines (writes short essay on how you need to be more present with your family so she can sell a minimalist metal sign that says “be present” in cursive for $70) or Pioneer Woman (so folksy and rural American, but now worth hundreds of millions of dollars thanks to her made-in-China housewares line at Walmart).

Did you rip your favorite passages out of your books, put the pages in a file cabinet, and throw the rest away, like Kondo told you to do? Now you can put her $12 shiatsu stick on your bare bookshelves for decoration. Who needs Tennyson when you can have a pointy piece of wood?

Did you throw out all your kitchen utensils because they didn’t “spark joy”? Bravo, now you can buy her (obviously highly utilitarian) bamboo tea whisk.

You want to know how to have a tidy house? Stop buying pointless garbage from everyone who has had 15 minutes of fame on cable or streaming services.

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