I told everyone about how our daughter lost her bearded dragon last year. We ended up getting her a new, much younger dragon after that, which we named Henry Flagler.
We picked Henry out of all the dragons for sale because he was running around with a raspberry mustache. And, boy, does Henry love to eat berries. In fact, he loves to eat pretty much anything. We found a berry-flavored salad dressing for him, and he can really put the salad away now. Have you ever shopped for salad dressing for a lizard?
But nothing compares to watching Henry hunt crickets. The last bearded dragon was very lazy (except when he decided to run off into the jungle one day). We’d put crickets in his terrarium and they’d crawl all over him. Occasionally he would eat one, but they weren’t a big deal to him.
Henry is athletic. You put crickets in his terrarium and he lifts himself up and chases them everywhere. Sometimes he eats several in one bite. Because of that he’s growing freakishly fast. At some point, Henry is going to be bigger than our house cat.
My husband eventually got tired of running up to PetCo every couple of days to get crickets for the lizard. And when your lizard puts away half the crickets in Florida that starts to get a little expensive. Enter the Internet.
Yesterday, in the midst of all this chaos, we received a package on our doorstep. It was a deceptively quiet package, considering my husband somehow thought it was a good idea to order 500 CRICKETS online.
“What were you thinking?” I wailed.
“For five dollars more, I could have bought a thousand,” he replies.
Do you know how LOUD 500 crickets are at night? Deafening! And the jungle outside is already loud with barred owls that sound like screeching monkeys and bull frogs. (You can’t complain about the bull frogs though, because like Henry, they eat all the insects.)
Apparently, the secret to keeping crickets alive is cardboard. I don’t know if they eat it or what. But at least all our Amazon packaging now has a purpose beyond the recycling bin.
I am most afraid of how quickly they are going to multiply.