My summer garden is going to be LIT

Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.

Oscar Wilde

It’s no secret in these parts that I work out my frustration on the hiking trails and in the soil. Unfortunately, the coronavirus fascists have blocked access to the best trails in our town because someone might get infected from a palm tree. So that leaves me with the garden.

Like a true quant, I put together a spreadsheet of all the plants I have put into my gardens. My gardening aesthetic trends more toward Versailles than English cottage on a normal day, but being kept at home this spring means, well… Look at what I’ve done.

  • Dinner Plate dahlias – 6
  • Pompom dahlias – 6
  • Stargazer lilies – 27
  • Asiatic lilies – 66
  • Freesias – 165
  • Four o’clocks – I don’t even know anymore
  • Spider lilies – 12
  • Double tiger lilies – 7
  • Big brother lilies – 7
  • Elephant ears – 41
  • Magic star double oriental lilies – 3
  • Gladioli – 60
  • Hollyhocks – 8
  • Liatris – 48
  • Impatiens – 245
  • Dragon wing begonias – 9
  • Petunias – 30
  • Salvia – 7
  • Hibiscus bushes – 3 (two red, one yellow)
  • Canna (pink) – 4
  • Canna (red) – 12
  • Canna (Picasso) – 12
  • Alstromeria – 14
  • 1 Valencia orange tree
  • 1 Mango tree
  • Royal poinciana tree (on its way)
  • Cosmos – 10
  • 1 Corn tree
  • 1 Fringe flower bush
  • 2 Silver buttonwood bushes
  • 2 Ficus trees
  • Birds of paradise (large white ones) – 6
  • Crotons – 10
  • Ferns – 20
  • Phlox – 2
  • Calla lily – 3
  • Ixia – 60
  • Kniphofia – 6
  • Gingers (some culinary!) – 5
  • A bunch of flowers that I can’t remember because I ordered them from a couple websites online in the middle of the worst days of the financial crisis while watching futures trading and now I can’t remember the sites, but maybe they will arrive at some point and please don’t tell my husband

Y’all, that’s close to a thousand plants that I have planted in over a couple months. I need professional help!

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